There, I said it. Most of the criticisms levelled at Corbyn by what passes for conservative media will not cut through because nobody in the real world cares about the shit these Westminster bubblers are trying to make important.
What’s more, where there was a so-called ‘shy Tory’ vote in previous elections, undetected by opinion polls, it’s entirely possible that there will be a ‘shy Labour’ voter effect this time round, due to the stigma that some have tried to attach to Corbyn and his views.
Such a lot of noise has been made about Corbyn’s unconventional views, that there will be plenty of people out there who won’t say to a pollster or media type that they will be voting Labour, but they’ll do it anyway… or they won’t make up their mind until in the polling booth, then they’ll vote the way they always have done.
However much the Tories wish people would get their knickers in a twist about the anti-semitism issue – god knows the Spectator hasn’t shut up about it since forever – it’s just not happening.
Also, no-one cares about the IRA, or Corbyn’s links to them. A lot of people didn’t care (or secretly rejoiced) when the IRA blew up the Tory conference in Brighton in 1984. A lot of people in England couldn’t care less about Northern Ireland… it rightfully belongs to the Irish, not to us, and we don’t want our cities blowing up by people fighting a righteous cause against us – and this, by the way, differentiates the IRA’s cause from any the Muslims might have.
Now, it’s possible that there are still some ‘shy tories’ out there… but not very many… very few have hidden their Brexit preferences under a bushel, and in a great many cases, that means they have no choice – if they vote at all – but to vote Tory if they want Brexit.
There may be a vanishingly small handful of people who were not on the establishment side in the battle of Orgreave yet will put aside a lifelong grudge to vote Tory today, but will never admit it to a living soul. These will be well within the margin of error, compared to the millions who – contrary to the expectations of London-centred pollsters – will trot to the polls and vote Labour because that’s what they have always done, and a vote for the Tories and the toff philanderer Boris would be the worst political betrayal they could commit against their own consciences.
Some leftish Brexiters may even reason that since the Brexit Party so clearly isn’t going to deliver, that they’d be better off with no Brexit than with whatever corporatist sellout the untrustworthy Boris is promising, and so default to Labour or fall into the wobbly, hairy bosom of Jo Swinson.
Hell, it’s cold, it’s pissing down and the cat needs to go to the vet. Many will probably decide, like me, not to dignify this shabby election at all.
If you’ve got any bets placed on today’s outcomes, good luck! My money is on a low turnout and no-overall majority.