Gay Marriage & Forced Entry *snigger*

Ahh.. gay marriage. Is there anyone who should really have an opinion about it other than gay people?

Well, it turns out that everyone has an opinion on it because, thanks once again to the state, it’s become everyone’s problem.

Some people think it’s a disgusting, disgraceful, sinful calumny. Most of those people take advice from a man in a dress, with an imaginary best friend, who thinks that contraception is a sin, and a woman should not be allowed an abortion even when her life is in danger, or when the spawn is the product of a rape, yet who is also an alcoholic abuser of young boys.

You know what, though? If those people want to think that, it’s fine with me. So long as I’m able to point and laugh, and call them on their small-minded hypocritical idiocy.

I have no problem whatsoever with gay marriage. I understand that there are sound legal reasons for equalising rights between gay and straight couples, in terms of the legal protections and entitlements that are accrued by married people, but not currently by those in a civil partnership.

That said, I think marriage is mainly a ludicrous construct. To involve the state – or the frontmen of a sky pixie – in one’s personal relationships is a need which baffles me to this day. This is all by the by though. If people want to get married then whatever…  and the legal benefits, if you’re prepared to play the game, are plain to see.

The current public debate about gay marriage, though, isn’t about gays or marriage. That’s just a smokescreen. The debate is about whether the state should be able to force private institutions to undertake ceremonies which, rightly or wrongly, they hold to be immoral.

The answer to this is simple: Of course they fucking shouldn’t. The state should have no business in dictating to any religious institution about what they must and must not undertake within the bounds of natural law.

Sure, there’ll be some religious organisations that will be prepared to perform gay marriage ceremonies – good for them. But the corollary must be that there’ll be those which refuse to do so, for whatever reasons they choose. There are always non-religious wedding options as well.

Why cannot this be the status quo? If you want to get gay married, you should be able to get gay married. If you want to perform this marriage service, fair enough. If you do not want to perform the service, fine. Everyone actually gets what they want in this scenario.

But oh no. This isn’t good enough for the ‘liberal elite’ (perhaps the most disingenuous two-word phrase in the English language). They want to make the pious suffer for their foolishness and ignorance. If the irony of secular liberals imposing an orthodoxy on dissenting religious groups is lost on you, by the way, you’re a fucking idiot. Go away.

Gays: shop around. And what are you even doing wanting to get married in the church/mosque/temple of a creed that holds your very being in such contempt? Is it really a victory for anyone if you FORCE them to marry you. Your wedding vows overseen by a man under duress who holds you in contempt? Wow – you should be so proud.

Settled? I think so.

AJ

Supertard DJs… Here we go!

Oh dear oh dear oh dear. It’s a funny old world, innit?

The other day, two idiot Australian radio DJs made a prank phone call to the hospital where a royal wench is undergoing intensive treatment for feeling a bit queasy, and having a bit of a dribbly bottom. In so doing the idiot DJs committed the capital crime of doing an impression of the Queen so badly that even Jon Culshaw would have been embarrassed by it.

Nevertheless, a bamboozled foreign nurse gave out confidential information over the phone.

*sigh*

Global storm of outrage is whipped up by idiot media. Planes take to the skies above Bristol, trailing banners proclaiming, “THIS MUST NEVER BE ALLOWED TO HAPPEN AGAIN”.

Fuckwits on Twitter whip up a lynch mob to protect/avenge ‘our Kate’.

Bamboozled foreign nurse kills herself.

Fuckwit Twitter lynch mob bays for the heads of the idiot DJs, completely heedless of their own roles in the unfolding tragedy.

Twattish media saying Idiot DJ’s on are now on ‘suicide watch’. Twitter steps up its demands for their heads on a barbecue.

Can you guess what will happen next? I propose pre-empting that by starting a Twitter lynch mob to bay for the heads of the Twitter lynch mob that bayed for the head of the bamboozled nurse, then bayed for the heads of the idiot DJs when they got precisely what they wanted.

It’s hard to know where to start really. It’s like a meta-cluster-fuckwit-athon. You could light cities with it.

Eventually, all of time and space will collapse in on itself under the weight of all this unbridled stupidity.

Pull up a chair, grab a beer. And remember… This whole idiot DJ/suicide thing all rests on the profoundly shaky premise that a jumped up shop girl who married wisely is of any importance whatsoever.

Dicks.

AJ

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