Andrew Mitchell’s Sacking

Dave: Ah, come in Andrew, take a seat. I trust you watched the induction video in reception?

Andrew: Oh.. er not really. I was watching my portfolio on my phone.

Dave: Come now , Andrew. We know what we’re here for. I’ve to give you a good talking to and take away your tiffin rights for a year. This is not easy for me.

Andrew: I knew it would come to this *slumps shoulders* *hangmong expression*

Dave: Don’t worry Andrew. It will turn out fine. Should blow over in a year or so.

Andrew: I’m all at sea, Prime Minister.

Dave: How so? You know the drill, chap.

Andrew: It’s just that… I don’t care about the money.. *does the oodles dance* .. it’s the ability to set intractable problems for publicly employed imbeciles that I’ll really miss.

David: *adjusts tie* We’ll all miss that in 2015, chap. *dabs eye with napkin*. But to other matters.  We’re busy writing the Queen’s honours list. Would Sir Andrew care to go quietly and with decorum?

Sir Andrew: Naturally, Prime Minister. It has been my most profound pleasure to serve me.

David: Likewise, Sir Andrew. I say, pass your wife, would you?

Sir Andrew: Tell her not to wake me back when she get’s back.




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