Give, give and give some more…

It’s all voluntary.

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Yes. Yes, you did read that right. A government plan to increase philanthropy.

Banks are to adopt a system that allows people to make a small donation to charity whenever they withdraw cash.

The Government also wants shops to offer customers the opportunity to “round up the pound” when using a debit or credit card, with the extra money going to charity.

Pfffft. Whatever. A million reasons why that’s a crappy idea, from the outset.

Where will all those pennies go? Who is the arbiter?

No doubt favoured schemes and fake charities will do very nicely out of it: ASH will get cash to bully and denormalise smokers. The RSPCA will have more money to pursue vindictive and unjust private prosecutions against animal lovers. The NSPCC will have spondoolies to spend on stigmatising and eliminating home-schoolers.

And there are plenty more where those came from. The special interest groups and QUANGOs masquerading as charities are queuing round the block to take your money and use it to persecute the person stood next to you.

In any case, could it be that, actually, we give plenty and there’s no need at all for ..

The plans in a discussion paper published by Francis Maude, the Cabinet Office minister, who wishes to foster a culture of charitable giving.

‘Wishes to foster a… ‘. That’s straight out of the ‘3rd sector’ bullshit bingo playbook.

Okay, sorry Francis. You’re gonna have to fuck off, I’m afraid. You’ve swallowed that big throbbing charity cock whole, mate.

And whatever he’s been reading recently, must have been a pretty well drug-induced view of the concept of altruism.

“We are arguing for new social attitudes that celebrate giving,” Mr Maude said. “Talking about what we do for good causes is often seen as vulgar. But sharing experiences can inspire others.

“Giving is too often characterised as worthy and selfless, but there’s nothing wrong with doing things for each other and repaying kindnesses.

“If we can agree as a society the values that underpin helping each other we can unlock huge potential for a stronger, bigger society.”

Have you ever heard such utter shit?

But wait. It gets better.

Under the proposals, which will lead to plans for legislation in the spring, people could also be prompted to give money when they fill in tax returns or apply for passports, driving licences and other state services. They may also be encouraged to donate over new mobile phone services.

That’s right. While the government is charging monopoly rates for mandatory pieces of paper, the proceeds of which keep millions of bureaucrats off the streets, you’ll also be leaned on to donate to a CHARITY!?

Hectored at every fucking transaction.

Think about that, next time you’re paying for your road tax, the proceeds of which go nowhere near road building and maintenance.

Mull it over as you click ‘submit’ to pay tens of thousands of pounds in tax each year, on threat of imprisonment. Money that will be siphoned off, from your pockets, into the pockets of scroungers, wasters, peasants, bureaucrats, foreign aid, the fucking QUEEN.

Consider it as you stare down the barrel of a new calendar year, in which you’ll work the first 5.5 months just to pay for the state, and before you’ve earned a penny to put food on your table.

Feeling philanthropic? Then you’re a fucking idiot.

Mr Maude said the Coalition was not trying to “compel” people to give. But he unveiled two schemes that would offer taxpayers’ money to match private donations.

Go on, read that again.

The coalition is not ‘trying to compel people to give’.

But he unveiled two schemes that would offer taxpayers’ money to match private donations.

I‘m a taxpayer. It’s MY MONEY. YOU’RE COMPELLING ME TO GIVE, you utter cunts.

But, you know… people in this country already give quite a lot to charity, I reckon.

Britons are already among the most generous donors in the world. This country is currently ranked as the eighth most charitable nation.

About 73 per cent of people donate money each year with individuals giving charities an estimated £10.6 billion a year.

So… errr. What precisely is the compelling argument for this massive project of make-work and syphoning even more money away to favoured special interest groups? What makes them think, especially with times as they are, that we have ANY MORE TO GIVE??

However, Britons are much less generous at donating their time by volunteering compared with many other countries.

Oh… right. We’re uncharitable with our time?

Yes, you fucking cunt. We don’t HAVE time. We are TIME POOR compared to those in most western countries. We work longer hours, we commute further, on a less efficient infrastructure.

And what if we do want to volunteer? That’s right. We have to be CRB checked, measured, approved, licensed and authorised. Risk assessed, health and safety trained, diversity aware, compliant and certified.

In summary, Francis Maude, if you want to give the impression that you, and the government are ‘in touch’ with the people, I have a simple suggestion that will go a long way to achieving your goal:

Stop being a complete cunt, just for a day, eh?

AJ

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About Al Jahom
Anti-social malcontent, misanthrope and miserable git.

7 Responses to Give, give and give some more…

  1. Jiks says:

    Well said.

    I’m pretty sure it takes me well past May to start earning money for myself instead of for those useless ****s once council tax, VAT, etc is included.

    So if they think I’m giving one penny more to their mates fake charity they can go forth, etc.

  2. patently says:

    They want me to give more to charity? OK, halve my taxes then.

    Until then, I’ll point at how much of my money is already taken on the pretence of helping the poor, the needy, and the third world, and tell you that I already gave, thanks. Yes, I know that very little of it actually ends up providing real help to the poor, then needy, and the third world, but if the people who want me to give more are already wasting most of what I give them, then that’s hardly a reason to give them more, is it?

  3. PJH says:

    The special interest groups and QUANGOs masquerading as charities are queuing round the block to take your money and use it to persecute the person stood next to you.

    Um – try again. The fake-charidees are already using the tax I pay on my tobacco (and PAYE, and VAT) to persecute me now. You even mentioned ASH.

    They don’t even need to start on my neighbour (well, they probably already have, but I hope you get my point…)

  4. Pingback: taking money | Kevin Burctoolla's gaming world

  5. Catosays says:

    AJ. Have tried to make it a little more coherent than it was last night. I hope it’s ok.

  6. Ed P says:

    I’m with Ayn Rand on this: Altruism is the refuge of the second-handers – a false and vicious idea supported by parasites living off real wealth creators. We’ve had her “looters”, stealing the fruits of our labours through taxation, now it’s her “moochers”, extracting what’s left through a fake appeal to our empathy. Not from me, not a single penny!

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